4 Things In MADAME WEB That Make No Sense

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Madame Web is tanking at the box office and is already getting its label as one of the worst comic book movies of all time. Some even go further to call it one of the worst movies of all time. And while the movie is set in Sony’s universe of Spider-Man characters with no Spider-Man himself, it’s one of the most baffling films ever made, given some of its choices. Actually, almost all the choices made on and off screen are hard to understand after watching Madame Web. Especially since they all have to do with the Madame Web plot, which has left me and many others, mystified by the movie and what it decides to do.

So here are the 4 major aspects of Madame Web that are completely non-sensical.

Please note that the following discussion about the Madame Web plot will be full of spoilers.

Madam Web Plot Relies Heavily On Her Powers

Madame Web plot girls.
Image via Sony.

Madame Web is a Marvel Comics character that can see the future. But she can also see how different elements can come together and be connected in a web of cause and effect. The movie explains her powers as coming from her mom getting bit by a special spider in the Amazon when she was pregnant with Cassie (Dakota Johnson). This transferred the power of foresight to Cassie; a power that is usually referred to as Spider-Sense in the Spider-Man stories. However, in this movie, Cassie can see things before they happen. Giving her a do-over to certain bad situations and events. So far so good, but then things go off the deep end in the climax.

In the climax, when Cassie has to save the 3 girls she protects the whole movie, she embraces her powers and is able to astral project herself separately to each of the 3 girls to save them. Nowhere in the movie does it explain this crazy super-powered act. The mysterious spider-person-man in the Amazon told her she could use her power to be in different places all at once. But the obvious inference of that was that she could see different things using her gift of foresight. Not that she could physically, or astrally, literally be in different places. It’s never explained after either.

There’s So Much Spider-Man In A Movie Supposedly Without Him

Spider-Women.
Image via Sony.

One of the supporting characters in the Madame Web plot is Ben Parker (Adam Scott), Peter Parker’s uncle. But in this timeline, Peter isn’t born yet. But the movie takes us to his mother’s baby shower, for some reason. There’s even a cheesy joke from his mom (Emma Roberts) about him ‘leaping around’ inside. Get it? ‘Cuz he will be Spider-Man. It’s pretty cringey.

But it doesn’t make sense that Ben and Mary Parker are in this movie, even going as far as Peter’s actual birth happening in the middle of the climax, albeit in a different place than the events of this movie. But why? If Sony cannot make a Spider-Man movie given the MCU Spider-Man deal with Marvel Studios, why write so many Spider-Man and Peter Parker elements into the Madam Web plot, if you’re trying to avoid a Spider-Man connection? Especially when none of these experiences at all impact either Ben or Mary. It’s not like Ben learns something here that he passes to Peter or any other subtle connection. 

Even the main lore of the story apparently involves mythical Spider-people who get powers from spiders naturally found in the Amazon. So they basically took the Peter Parker origin story, of him getting bit by a radioactive spider, and expanded it into a legendary lore that happens to a tribe in the Amazon? Again, why?

Madame Web Is A Superhero Movie Without Fight Scenes

Madame Web plot Cassie.
Image via Sony.

Another glaringly confusing aspect of the Madame Web plot is how it’s completely devoid of any action whatsoever. Most of the big set pieces involved Cassie and the 3 supporting characters running away from the main villain. That’s it. The movie tells us that given his powers, the women are actually incapable of fighting against the main villain. So the entire movie is them running away, and the villain getting taken down through chaotic events, or getting hit with a car (twice) or just dumb luck. Like in the climax, where it’s just a series of things blowing up around them, distracting the villain until he falls to his death. And then a big neon sign falls on him.

Which is so weird, because, apparently in the future, it takes 3 young women with Spider powers to kill him. But here he just dies due to clumsiness. And speaking of—

The Most Underdeveloped Villain In Superhero Movie History

Madame Web plot Heroes.
Image via Sony.

The villain in the Madame Web plot is someone granted powers from that special spider. Let’s leave behind the performance or the weird ADR of his dialogue. Within the story itself, Ezekial betrays and murders Cassie’s mom in 1973 and steals the special spider that gives people powers. We then see him again in 2003, looking like he hasn’t aged a day. So he’s been able to get powers from the spider he stole in the 70s. But he has visions of 3 spider-powered young girls that kill him sometime in the future. So he needs to kill them first. But the movie never explores who Ezekial has become in the 30 years since killing Cassie’s mom. Has he used the spider to become rich and famous? Somehow?

Also, the movie never explains why the girls are trying to kill him. Is there a connection between them? Will there be? No justification, as if the movie doesn’t really care about minor things like the motivation of the villain. Just like we know nothing about him as a person, even. How is one able to just walk around, killing cops, destroying diners, and attacking people in the middle of a busy intersection, without any consequences or concerns? Is he like Kingpin that he has the whole city and its cops on his payroll? There is absolutely zero backstory about who he is, why he’s doing what he is, and ultimately what is even happening. Which is basically the entire movie, to begin with.

Madame Web is playing in theatres. For now.

What did you think of all these non-sensical things in the Madame Web plot? Let me know in the comments below, or follow me on X (Twitter) at @theshahshahid for more movie talk. 

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Entertainment Writer | Film & TV Critic | Bollywood Blogger | Host of Split Screen Podcast | Proud Geek Girl Dad