It looks like Hasbro is whoring out every brand possible in a new deal they stuck with Universal. We get the scoop today from the professionals at Variety:
Universal Pictures has announced a six-year partnership with Hasbro to produce at least four feature films based on branded properties. The properties include “Monopoly,” “Candy Land,” “Clue,” “Ouija,” “Battleship,” “Magic, The Gathering” and “Stretch Armstrong.” The deal comes after the successful screen transformation of the Hasbro property “Transformers,” which DreamWorks and Paramount turned into a Michael Bay-directed global hit, and which has a sequel scheduled to begin production this year.
“This deal gives Universal access to some of the greatest brands in the world,” Shmuger and Linde said in a statement. “Hasbro’s portfolio of products has tremendous emotional resonance with children and adults. They offer an exciting opportunity for us to develop tentpole movies with built-in global brand awareness, which is a key component of our slate strategy.”
How the fuck are you going to pull off Battleship the movie? Are you going to have a film about 10 boats that launch missiles at each other till one remains? You know at one point when a captain is going down with the ship he will proclaim: “you sunk my battleship”. If video game films always suck, I can only imagine the type of films we are going to get that are based on classic table games.
I enjoy the card game Magic: The Gathering, the name is horrible but the game itself is gobs of fun. I really do not want to see a film based on the game; it is going to be awkward. They do have enough imagery, and characters to make a fantasy style film in the world of Dominaria, but Hasbro has shown in the past that they are more concerned with moving future product than they are about making a quality film celebrating their work. (Remember when they killed Optimus to sell Rodimus and Ultra Magnus?)
This just seems strange , they are pimping out all these brand for the familiarity of the name. I am doubtful that any of these projects will be good and I get confused when I try to consider how they will approach them. I guess we will wait and see. Until then, unpack your game of battleship, and enjoy it as it was intended.
They’ll probably end up going the “Jumanji” route on some of these movies.
Personally I think it’s stupid to make these games into movies, but. Whatever.
Whoops. Didn’t see Candyland up there. I guess that’s the endorsement.
In its stead, Operation.
Only two of these got my attention. The first is Stretch Armstrong. I could see a film based on the character. Then again, we have had Incredibles and Mr. Fantastic from Fantastic Four. I’m still waiting for a Plastic Man film. Still, I suppose Armstrong has some credit: get him cold and he won’t stretch as much. Second, the slightest cut and that funky goo bleeds out of his arm.
The next one of course….“Ouija,”
“Ouija” – it’s supposed to only supposed to be a game but… since folks believe (we’ll just say that for now) they can contact the dead with this wooden board, it could lend itself to a haunted house/ghosts type film. But all it will wind up doing is inspire Mike Bay’s Platinum Dunes to snap up remake rights to the 80’s B classic Witchboard…
*****
I’m not sure how a film would actually work with any of the above. HOWEVER…check out Seeler’s reccomendations!
1) Candyland
2) Mr. Potato Head
3) Hungry Hungry Hippos (animated feature)
4) Risk.
I can see the trailer for Slinky: the Movie now;
(black screen, soft opening to the Requiem for a Dream theme plays)
Title Slide
It climbs the stairs
(Quick close-up flash)
Title Slide
It’s fun for everyone
(Quick close-up flash)
Title Slide
Everyone loves a…
(Quick close-up followed by full pull-out, reveal slinky image)
Title Slide
SLINKY!
Requiem for a Dream theme plays as it descends a staircase
Does anyone remember the Clue VCR Game that came out in the VHS heyday? That was a boring game, watching so many of clips over and over. But they did make a movie of Clue at one point as well. Which was a curious piece at best. Had the writers strike really made these studios desperate? While its a nice idea, I really think its a stupid one as well.
Hey good luck with these movies. There’s probably a bunch of writers chomping at the bit :)
I’ve got two ideas on how to make ‘Battleship’ into a movie.
How about a movie about a battleship set which belongs to the mighty Greek god Zeus which actually has the power to control mighty sea battles on Earth and which Zeus uses to amuse himself. Then his set gets lost, falls to Earth and gets picked up by a competetive group of children who constantly play to defeat each other, unaware that entire sea fleets are being destroyed because of them, and someone (i guess you Doug) has to retrieve it for Zeus.
Or for the second idea, just take the battleship, send it into outer space and call it the Yamato and you have a movie.
No charge Hasbro, no charge;)
Um, they already made a movie based on Clue, and it CAN NOT be improved upon.
this has to be a joke right? last i checked it’s not april 1st