Without a doubt my worst film going experience in the last 3 years is when I had to go and watch the new Paris Hilton movie “The Hottie and the Nottie”. The film was beyond bad, and for only the 3rd time in my limited career I gave a movie a 0 our of 10. Yes, it really was that bad. The 23 of you out there who actually went to see it know what I mean.
However, as bad as that garbage was… it wasn’t the worst experience I had in the theater that day. You see, before the movie started, a trailer came on screen that was without question one of the worst I’ve ever seen. Its almost as if the trailer was a commercial for “The Lose All Hope In Cinema Foundation”. Yes, before Hottie and the Nottie, I had to endure the trailer for “Witless Protection“.
Now let me say this. I think Larry the Cable Guy is one hell of a stand up comedian. I really do. Having said that, this man has no business being in the movies or having half baked script force written around him. Witless Protection will be no exception. This movie smells like 7 different flavors of shit downwind from a tire fire in August.
But there is good news! If you live in Canada, rejoice and be glad for I bring you joyous news that shall be for all the people. No screens in Canada will be wasted on this movie! Our buddy Michael over at MoviesOnline gives us this:
WitLess Protection may be getting an American theatrical run but the lowly canucks, me included will have to wait for it on DVD. Word comes today from Maple Pictures that the film will not get a theatrical run in Canada.
Watching that trailer really does make me feel like I’m living in some sort of twilight zone. Because you know they’re only making it because there are some people out there who will actually watch this. In a world where Meet The Spartans comes in at #1 at the box office, anything is possible.
maple leaf flag sucks! lmao
lol…yes some dude!!! America!! fuck yea!! lo
that was all a joke by the way…canada seems like a great place to live and this makes it even better..
FUCK CANADA! FUCK ENGLAND! AND FUCK LARRY THE CABLE GUY!
FUCK CANADA! AND FUCK ENGLAND!
@ Kanthan
It’s not the difference in the culture, just the prejudices of the person forming the opinion.
yeah, but also living in Canada we got shafted out of The Signal, so it works both ways, Johnny.
They actually filmed parts of this movie in the town next to mine (Plano, IL), and one of my friends can, allegedly, be seen in a few scenes; and that still isn’t enough for me to sit through this festering pile of stupid.
That said, from what I have heard from friends, local businessmen and town officials, Larry the Cable Guy is one hell of a nice guy, not so much a good comedian, but a good person nonetheless.
John, I agree with you that this movie is not the high-quality that we desire for in the movies we watch. However, *why* is the movie not being released in Canada? Did Maple Pictures really decide in the interest of good taste, to not distribute the film? I can’t help think there are “Big Brother” forces at work here. Why should Maple-Pictures decide for us? I say let the people decide for themselves.
@Pete
‘Wow! Canadians really are smarter than americans.’ like that was ever in doubt, i m english and we know a high percentage of americans are dumbasses (not all mind you)I m guessing its the diffrence in culture
Wow! Canadians really are smarter than americans.
I loathe, absolutely despise Larry the Cable Guy. His humor is fantastically unfunny and I don’t understand the hordes of people who think he’s entertaining. I swear he is the beginning of the end of intelligent civilization. When I think of Idiocracy I think of him, spoof movies and reality TV heading society down that path.
I’m looking forward to the movie. He’s a funny guy, although that army movie he did was kind of lame.
BLAME CANADA!
(for having the right sense of mind not to show it)
“…had to go and watch the new Paris Hilton movie…”
You crack me up.
I agree with you, John. I think Larry is really funny but wtf is he doing in movies?
By the way, if the three movie set of Meet The Spartans, The Hottie and the Nottie, and Witless Protection comes out on DVD, I will buy it for you as a peace offering from the USA to Canada. Then I will meet you in the battlefield :)
Maybe it’s because we “just don’t get it”?
;)
Thank God for small miracles.