For those of you who haven’t heard. Viacom (The company that owns MTV and Comedy Central) is suing Youtube and the their parent company Google. Before I break into my bloodlust rant, here’s the skinny from the good folks over at Cinematical:
According to CNN, Viacom, parent company of MTV and Comedy Central, filed suit against YouTube and its parent company Google Tuesday. The suit alleges that YouTube has “almost 160,000 unauthorized clips of Viacom’s programming have been available on YouTube and that these clips had been viewed more than 1.5 billion times.” If that’s true, what does Viacom want from Google and YouTube in the way of damages? How about a cool billion dollars. Yes, I said billion.
Viacom is a bunch of inbred morons. I apologize… that was inappropriate. What I should have called them was a gaggle of fucktards and self ass-sniffers who probably pleasure themselves while watching Betty White smoke (no offense intended to Betty White). This is the most ridiculous lawsuit I’ve ever heard of, and only goes to prove how out of touch these media giants are who can’t ever seem to stop navel gazing long enough to see how the world is changing around them.
Let me break this down into what I call my “Points of Stupidity” and explain why this lawsuit is asinine on several levels:
POINT OF STUPIDITY #1 – THE CONCEPT OF DAMAGES
Canadian law (a field which I worked in for a number of years before launching The Movie Blog) is a little different from American law… but I think the same principle here needs to apply. The principle is this: You can only really sue someone for no greater amount than what you can OBJECTIVELY SHOW THAT THE OTHER PARTY COST YOU. For example, if I accidently broke your $500 piano… you can’t sue me for $2000. You can only sue me for what I actually cost you. There are some exception obviously, but you get the idea.
Viacom’s argument here fails on this level. They would like you and the courts to believe that every time one of us saw a clip from an MTV show, or a Comedy Central show (that already aired and we missed) it COST them something. Even a 3 year old understands this is totally bullshit. The fact of the mater is that most of the clips you see are from shows that already aired (so you couldn’t watch it now anyway) that we don’t normally watch anyway. So me watching that 2 minute clip from The Colbert Report (which I missed, and don’t normally watch anyway) didn’t actually cost Viacom ANYTHING. Not a cent.
POINT OF STUPIDITY #2 – FREE PUBLICITY
Keep in mind my scenario from Point #1. If I don’t normally watch The Colbert Report… but someone points me to a hilarious 2 minute clip from last weeks show… do you think I am now MORE likely or LESS likely to tune into the next show???? Obviously I’m now MORE LIKELY to try to catch the show. I never even HEARD of the Colbert Report before I saw a clip of it on Youtube.
Remember that whole thing with the Narnia clip from Saturday Night Live on Youtube a while ago? Come one now…. how many of us were watching Saturday Night Live anymore? NO ONE. That little short clip getting out on Youtube didn’t cost NBC a single penny. But what it did do, was get people doing what they haven’t done in years…. talking about Saturday night live again. All thanks to Youtube.
POINT OF STUPIDITY #3 – BLAMING PERSON A FOR THE ACTIONS OF PERSON B
This one really gets me. Youtube provides a great free service to people like me. As you know, I like to do my video reviews and put them up on Youtube. Lots of people use Youtube for what it’s intended for… uploading their own videos. However… some brain dead idiots claim taht Youtuvbe ENCOURAGES people to upload illegal material. That is total HORSE SHIT and purposeful ignorance.
Yoube gives warnings and notices all over the place telling people only to upload what belongs to them. They even took the step of limiting how long of a video you can upload to 10 minutes (which I hate). To say that Youtube ENCOURAGES people to use their product for the wrong purposes is just idiotic.
Now, there are people who misuse Youtube for purposes other than what it’s intended for. Youtube is pulling illegal videos down all the time… they try to keep up. But children over at Viacom want to hold them responsible for the actions of other people. Here… take this scenario:
A company makes a lovely metal bread box… the product is for people to keep their bread in. Nice. It’s shinny and beautiful and hold bread very well. However, one guy decides to pick up the bread box and smash his neighbor’s head in with it. According to Viacom, the company that made the bread box should be held responsible. The Bread Box wasn’t made for that… it was made for a much more innocent purpose… but because someone used it for the wrong purposes… the BREAD COMPANY should be held to blame (according to Viacom).
This is stupidity beyond all reason.
MY FINAL THOUGHTS
Viacom is evil AND stupid (a dangerous combination). They are attempting to take away from us a fantastic free service that hasn’t cost them a cent (in any real terms) but has got people talking about their shows and given them tons of free publicity. They want to hold Youtube responsible for the actions of a few other people, and are claiming damages (A BILLION dollars) far beyond anything that they’ve actually lost.
Ok Viacom… way to go. You’re attempting to take away a fantastic free service I use (Youtube)? Fine. You just pissed me off (just an average regular internet user and media consumer). In the end, that kind of thinking is going to cost your company a lot more than Youtube ever has. That may not mean much in the grand scheme of things, so maybe you don’t care. Either way… Congratulations.
