Thanks for checking out our Machete Review
Genre: Action
Directed by: Ethan Maniquis & Robert Rodriguez
Staring: Danny Trejo, Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba, Steven Seagal, Michelle Rodriguez, Jeff Fahey, Cheech Marin, Don Johnson, Lindsay Lohan
Released: Sept 3, 2010
THE GENERAL IDEA
The feature version of the trailer finds Machete (Trejo) a renegade former Mexican Federale, roaming the streets of Texas after a shakedown from drug lord Torrez (Steven Seagal). Reluctantly, Machete takes an offer from spin doctor Benz (Fahey) to assassinate McLaughlin (Robert De Niro) a corrupt Senator. Double crossed and on the run Machete braves the odds with the help of Luz (Michelle Rodriguez), a saucy taco slinger, Padre (Cheech Marin) his “holy” brother, and April (Lindsay Lohan) a socialite with a penchant for guns. All while being tracked by Sartana (Jessica Alba), a sexy ICE agent with a special interest in the blade slinger.
THE GOOD
Gun toting nuns, babes kicking ass and a grossly violent and intimidating Danny Trejo making bad people bleed and cars explode. What more can we ask for from the two minute fake trailer that has spawned this Mexi-flavoured violence extravaganza. Its all violence, eyecandy and silly justice fun. If you are going to hire Machete to kill the bad guy you better make sure the badguy isn’t you!!
This fits in that Expendables class of films that bring some nostalgia as we get some faces we didn’t expect as well as those we did. Linday Lohan was brief in this and considering her recent issues was removed from much of the promotion but she does a great job too.
Everyone is over the top, and its all shock and smiles. Nothing is to be taken seriously in this movie and they make sure you have a good time doing just that. Cheech Marin as a pothead? Lindsay Lohan as a substance abusing slut? DeNiro as a Taxi Driver? How can you not like these little tributes?
THE BAD
Some of the efforts to reflect the cheap grindhouse feel distract me from the film. There are moments when prop peices like traffic pylons intended to be out of frame look like they were intentionally put in the shot, and the itchy scratchy effect that I had hoped the whole film was presented in fades to a clean image after the opening credits drop. The effort to make it look cheap on purpose is countered by modern film making effects that of course will serve it well on Blu Ray.
It contradicts and makes it feel awkward. If you are going to go cheap, then make it cheap. Cleaning it up to make a “real film” took away from that intention in the first place. Its a constant contradiction that makes you wish they went one way or the other, but the film remains fun in spite of it.
OVERALL
A good fun romp at the cinema with lots of over the top action, some cheesey dated effects and a great throwback to a different era of film making.
I give Machete an 8 out of 10
OMG Just sat through that pile of Sh@*. Can’t believe this c*%t is still making movies. I’m thinking okay rehash some aspects of the trashy B-movie J but at least have some f()k”$n class about it. I’m glad I paid f all to watch it, what ever happened to plot, character development and sense of pride. The fact that this bitch is still making movies vexes me so!!!!
Isn’t 8 a little bit too much?
On the good side, glad to see Trejo again!
…or its not enough.
Who would have thought the spy kid would end up as a cholo ;-)
8/10 sounds good to me!
Any movie where the hero breaks someone’s arm while eating a burrito is alright with me!
You got that right!
I agree with your assessment of the “decide if you want to be cheap looking or legit”. About 15 minutes into the movie, I realized the grindhouse effects were gone as well. Kinda bummed me out a little.