I was just doing a little random internet surfing the other day looking at random crap when I came across this pretty funny little list of classic lines from Star Wars that take on a whole new meaning when you replace key words with the word “PANTS”. Some of the lines were dumb… but some were classic. Here are some examples:
“I find your lack of pants disturbing”
“I sense a tremor in my pants. The last time I felt it I was in the presence of my old master”
“The blast came from those pants! That thing is operational!”
“You are unwise to lower your pants”
“Don’t worry, Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this”
“She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send a detachment down there to retrieve them. See to it personally commander”
There are a whole bunch more over here that you can take a look at.
John: Never mind people telling you that you have to much free time. I think you have a gift… as well as Lee and Nick.
You guys are hilarious… you make my morning!!!
You want these Pants dont you?
May the Pants be with you.
Strike him down and take your farther’s Pant’s by my side!
Some of these are just hilarious John
I gotta keep going….. :-)
“It’s a good thing you have these pants. Yeah, I use them for smuggling. I’d never thought I’d be smuggling myself in them.”
“The pants chute was a wonderful idea! What an incredible smell you’ve discovered!”
“He certainly has pants…Yeah, but what good will it do us if he gets himself killed? Come on!”
“I want my pants back. I’m gonna need it to get out of this slimy mudhole.”
“Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the pants, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the pants around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.”
“Oh. I thought pants smelled bad on the outside.”
“Sir, it’s quite possible these pants are not entirely stable.”
“I happen to like nice pants!”
“What are you doing here? Ah, repairs. I was hoping you could help me out. What have you done to my pants? YOUR pants? Hey, remember you lost them to me, fair and square.”
“This bucket of pants never gonna get us past that blockade.”
“Bring my pants.”
“The Emperor’s coming here? That is correct, Commander. And, he is most displeased with your apparent lack of pants.”
“What could possibly have come over Master Luke? Is it something I did? He never expressed any unhappiness in my pants.”
I’ve got a few of my own below: :-)
“There isn’t enough pants on this planet to fill a space cruiser.”
“Strike me down with your pants.”
“How do you get so big eating pants of this kind?”
“Prepare for pants assault”
“I can arrange that. You could use some good pants”
“What are you doing? You’re not actually going into those pants?”
“It’s alright, just what I thought….pants.”
“Look sir…pants.”
“Yes, Greedo; I was just coming to see your boss. Tell Jabba I’ve got his pants”.
“Now don’t you forget this! Why I should stick my pants out for you is far beyond my capacity!”
“The more you tighten your pants, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers.”
“Where are you taking these…pants?”
“For over a thousand generations, the Jedi knights were the guardians of pants and justice in the old Republic… before the dark times… before the empire.”
“Pants can have a strong influence on the weak-minded.”
“I don’t know, whaddya think? You think a pair of pants and a guy like me…”
“We’ve analyzed their pants, sir, and there is a danger. Should I have your ship standing by?”
“In my experience, there’s no such thing as pants”.
“Let me see your pants. You don’t need to see his pants.”
I could keep going all friggin’ day! :-)
Also John, have you noticed how you tend to add the word ‘ass’ to some of your sentences (“ass awful & ass lucky for example). I suddenly realised that if you substitute one of the words in a film title with ‘ass’, it becomes very funny. Star Trek, for example:
Star ass: the motion picture
The ass of Khan
The search for ass
The voyage ass (my personal favourite)
Ass contact
Star Trek: Nemisass (oooooh, i apologise for that one)
I’m sure it works for lots of other films.
That site is classic. My wife thought it was the stupidest thing ever, but I laugh every time I think about it. Is this a ‘guy thing’, kinda like the ‘Three Stooges’?
The ones you chose to highlight are very suggestive, lol. I never noticed that before!
OMG!!! John I think you have a little too much time on your hands now. But this is very funny. Someone should make a video of this.