Well the War Of The Worlds 2 disk DVD is upon us. The disk is full of good looking special features… except will someone please tell Steve Spielberg to take his head out of his ass and give us a freaking Director’s Commentary please!!!!!
However… there are a couple of DVD Special Features that we’re glad aren’t on there. Here are a couple from the good folks over at FilmFodder:
– Cruise Control -The grim visage of Tom Cruise stares intensely out of your screen, while the benefits of Scientology are chanted in the background. This plays continuously until you cede your free will and become one of his mindless minions.
– Thwart Xenu -a DVD game where you must run a maze evading evil psychiatrists, who hurl Xanax and Prozac at you, and reach the welcoming arms of L. Ron Hubbard.
I’d like to add a couple of others:
– EXPLAINING THE IMPOSSIBLE – In this riveting feature Steven Spielberg explains his complete abandon of logic on how an unarmed teenage kid can run into battle against a horde of giant alien death machines with a bunch of US military troops… and yet be the only one to survive…. AND beat his father back to Boston at the same time.
– THE ULTIMATE WEAPON – An alternate ending to War of the Worlds where the alien invaders decide to leave earth just to get the hell away from Dakota Fanning’s constant and annoying as hell yelling.
– THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE – A series of deleted scenes where Tom Cruise falls in love with one of the Aliens and goes on to appear on daytime talk shows where he acts like a complete moron jumping up and down professing his new found love of “hot alien action”. (taken out of film for time restraints).
Which ones would you add to the list?
WTF ?! i have to say, this movie was extremly terrible. honest to god, i have never seen a movie with that many plot holes. what exactly did the birds do to bring down such a monstrosity… did they, i dunno.. peck at it? there may have been decent actors and all but really… SO MANY PLOT HOLDS. i was extremly disappointed, like for real, as if brilliant aliens couldnt use heat sensors or something other than big eyes on long tentacles. i kind of feel sorry for steve the director, he Fucked up bad. as for the day after tomorow, atleast i wasnt asking myself thousands of questions at the end of it all.
Are you insane about The Day After Tomorrow…that movie was just as bad as War of the Worlds. Both of these movies totally sucked!!! Each ones plot was splotchy…but I will give Cruise credit for his performance…he may be a retard but his performances are always up to par. He always does a good job. And about Vanilla Sky…that movie was kick ass…it had plot and the acting was top notch. Sure, I had to watch it twice to get the whole thing…it confused me at first…but the movie was excellent. As for War of the Worlds…have you ever seen the original…now that is a good movie. This one totally bombed…what exactly kept you on the edge of your seat. The only thing that had me on the edge was when Dokota Fanning was screaming incoherantly and then the stupid son kept trying to get away…I was like YEAH, PLEASE ZAP HIM…it would have made the movie so much better. But somehow miraculously he survives and frontal assault by the aliens when a whole battalion of Marines couldn’t??? Yeah right…this movie is insulting to say the least.
NO way is it better than Day after Tomorrow! Day after Tomorrow had a plot that, while not that believable, at least didn’t have holes the size of Texas through it. It also had heroes. People willing to sacrifice for good. Cruise’s character was a jerk. A big, fat jerk. Throughout the movie you think he is going to gain the respect of his kids. he doesn’t. He’s still a jerk at the end of the movie. it’s almost like he’s playing himself. There is no stability. the movie is a big mashed up pool of mayhem. i am a true Sci-fi dork, and i wan’t a side dish of plot with my disaster flick. This is the most upset i have been about a movie since spiderman 2!
I think the movie was very good. Better than “The Day After Tomarrow”. I don’t care much for Tom Cruise, but I think he was very good in War Of The Worlds. I hope he keeps up the good work and stays away from movies like
‘Vanilla Sky”
‘. Dakota Fanning was very good, could of heard less screaming. I watched the movie 3 times in one week. It gets a 10 out of a possible 10. Way to go Steven..
Uh,nik to answer the question “What happened?”, i must say 2 words.
CRAPPY MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was on the edge of my seat the first 20 minutes, but by the time i realized that there was no plot and Cruise’s contract required him to be a huge jerk, i lost interest.
CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE PURPOSE OF THE BLOOD SPRAY IS????? Is it just to freak us out? It doesn’t freak me out unless i know an insidious purpose for it! Otherwise it’s just gross. This movie is awful. I don’t know how anyone liked it.
erm…..war of the worlds – i was on the edge of my seat…..literally!
I kind of got lost at the bit where Tom was pointing to the gung ho yankee soldier shouting somethng about the birds and then they were all back home??????? What happened?
And why wasnt the home in boston destroyed?
How about the real secret of the movie…Dokata Fanning was in fact a very far advanced alien compared to her counterparts (she can change shape) and is actually thousands of years old and it is she who actually plans and initiates the invasion…all the screaming and whining and wierd noises coming out of her mouth are actually a form of alien communication and that is why the damn things always “just happen” to show up when she is around screaming at everything.
I purchased the wide screen version of the Tom Cruise “War of the Worlds” and found the video quality to be horrible. I exchanged it at my retailer and found the second copy to be the same. Are any of you finding the same video quality being poor?
I like Dakota Fanning, but just watching the COMMERCIAL and hearing her scream and screech makes me want to yank her tongue out.
If you want my opinion, the best feature they could put on this DVD is to NOT have the movie on it….
The only good thing in war of the worlds was the special effects. But no plot, no heroes, and no ending make this movie near impossible to watch. I posted a comment waaayyyy back when the movie first came out, but i guess no one cared.
tom uses the power of scientology (and a turkey baster) to impregnate an aspiring actress whose brain had been inexplainably removed to produce the worlds greatest national defense against the aliens.- an army race of cruise-clones called “an army race of cruise- clones”.
born in litters of 12 twice monthly, these cruise clones had the natural ability to impregnate each other and soon they numbered in the millions. glibness was eradicated from the face of the earth. also eliminated was anyone over 5 feet tall. a nefarious plan was hatched (no pun intended) to turn all humans into mindless worshippers of hollywood hunk tom cruise (who does all his own death defying stunts as well as save the planet you know) and his katie queen (the most beautiful goddess on the planet by far) but the plan was thwarted by the wonderful and heroic tom cruise himself as he hung from a cliff and blew up a real train as he flew through the air destroying all the aliens so we could give all our money to dr. cruise who revealed that he had discovered the cure for dying and couch mites and that is why tom cruise is the great sea org and why tom cruise is our lord and savior amen.
I think it’s horrible that directors can’t take 3 hours out of their lives to do a commentary track on a DVD we pay too much for. It doens’t take that much effort to put more value for some customers into the product they’re selling. I guarantee you they don’t “reduce” the price of the DVD without the commentary.
As far as the actual War of the Worlds movie goes… I did like it. For sure.
But the above mentioned items were noticable.
I agree, I don’t think Spielberg has his head up his ass. He has his reasons for not doing commentaries and I can respect them. I enjoy commentary tracks as much as the next film nerd but if someone chooses not to do one, that’s cool too.
I loved War of the Worlds. If I remember correctly, didn’t John give it a 7 or 8 out of 10?
I’m actually against director commentaries. They tend to give away many film techniques and rob its movie magic. It’s great if you want to involved in the industry but when they say “this creature’s sound effect was made with a plunger!” – it kinda ruins it for you thereafter.
YEAHHH,BABY! Someone else hates Cruise and this movie as much as I do. Heres my favorite special features.
-Blooper. Cruise has just saved Fanning from the insane Tim Robbins when Brooke Shields comes out of nowhere and kicks his butt so hard he thinks he’s back on the set of “A Few Good Men” and promptly shouts “I want the truth!”
-Sub-Titles in alien in which they explain how, after millions of years observing the earth and having been on earth before, they didn’t know it was poisonous to them. “Blach, dwebb echh treill orst flork!” Translation-“Well, we just forgot.”
-Behind the scenes showing the green screen technology they used to make Cruise look taller than Dakota Fanning.
hahahahahaha, nothing like a good cruise-ridiculing to make my friday afternoon sweet as.
Can’t say i think much of his films(not saying i don’t watch em) , but don’t rate him.
DVD could contain:
* an alternate beginning. Aliens get a flu jab before they come to earth and wipe everyone out(should only last about five mins)
* a special feature on Robot-boy(the kid who ran head first into the wall of fire and explosions, survived and then flew home)
* sub-titles by kindergarten kids explaining what the hell is going on
Maybe an explaination would be good about how, after the first lightening storm, nothing electrical/mechanical worked (lights, cars etc.) but some guy with a video camera can film the rising of the first alien we see before he gets zapped….?!?!?!
anyone?
This actually might be my favourite movie this year.
i refuse to take part in your evil little game, campea!