Thanks to Kristina for the heads up on this. Hot damn, this guy doesn’t SOUND like Ledger… but wow he looks like a dead on Ledger Joker

This is nothing more than a silly little gag… but I thought it was funny

Long time Movie Blog reader Phil Gee sent me this video this morning and I’m just amazed at the job he did. Looks like he’s producing a “The Movie Blog - THE MOVIE” and he’s just released his trailer.

Seriously, if you love or hate the podcast, you’ll be amazed at the job Phil does on this little video.

I still feel stupid about it, but the first Charlie’s Angels movie actually caught me by surprise. I enjoyed it, I thought it was fun, lighthearted and Crispin Glover rocked in it. Now, everyone knows that the sequel completely sucked, so it’s for the best that Bill Murray wasn’t there to reprise his role as Bosley. I’ve heard several explanations gives for why he wasn’t there… but while surfing around the web this evening I came across this:

Bill Murray and Lucy Liu didn’t get along on the set of the first Charlie’s Angels. Bill was always uncomfortable around her and nobody knew why until one day a huge fight erupted between the two while they were filming a scene. People Magazine reported the Bill ‘loudly complained about her technique.’ People was being gentle.

What actually transpired was much more intense. Bill Murray stopped a scene in progress and pointed to Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Lucy Liu saying in order, “I get why you’re here, and you’ve got talent….but what in the hell are you doing here. You can’t act!” At that, Liu blew her lid and attacked Murray, wildly throwing punches. The actors had to be separated to opposite corners of the room while they lobbed verbal hand grenades at each other.

With a Columbia Pictures gun to their heads, both actors would publicly downplay in incident but insiders know better. Bill Murray would not do any sequel with Liu attached and was subsequently replaced by Bernie Mac.

HAHA! Ok, I love Bill Murray to the point of man crush… but that really was a son-of-a-bitch thing to say to a person you’re there working with. And you gotta admire the balls Lucy Lui has to not take shit from anyone… including the immortal Bill Murray… and will take swings at any mother fucker bitching her in front of her co-workers.

Still… Murray is hilarious. (source: Derober)

Yes, I’m a loser and a geek… and as such, this picture replaces any need I’d ever have for Viagra. God bless the internet. (thanks to Jarred for sending this to me)

In an interview this week Mark Wahlberg was asked if he’d consider joining The Funky Bunch for a reunion. He basically said “fuck no”, and that he’d just like to forget that era ever happened. Sorry Mr. Wahlberg… we like ya…. but we will not forget!

Some superhero concept movies that I personally don’t think would be very popular with the fans

This one seems frightening believable since Burton doesn’t seem to know how to make a film without Depp

I actually wouldn’t mind seeing a Robin movie… just not this one

You know… I may not mind this one too much

There are actually a bunch more of these over at Cracked. You can check them out here.

Perhaps Doug missed his true calling

Dear lord this is funny. Thanks to all you guys who emailed this to me today.

Just caught this trailer.

The Waldo Ultimatum - Watch more free videos

This is some good stuff

Found this on LosersOfTheYear.Net Just had to share. Even though disappointed, I still had fun with Indy 4… but this cartoon is pretty spot on

With a 64 year old Indiana Jones coming back and kicking all sorts of box office ass after a nearly 20 year lay off from the hat and whip… with a 61 year old Rambo combating genocide in jungle warfare resulting in glorious bloody victory… with a 59 year old Rocky Balboa coming out of a long retirement to go toe to toe with a much younger current heavyweight champion… and now with news that there is perhaps a 7th Rocky film on the horizon… and yes… even with a way past their primes 68 year old Al Pacino and a 65 year old Robert De Niro coming back as bad ass scary cops in Righteous Kill (don’t worry… I’m sure the movie will be great… after all it has 50 Cent in it so it’s got to be gold right? Please note sarcasm), I caught myself wondering today about what other old time action heroes it might be time to dust off and throw back into the box office ring?

I mean, if we can buy that a 68 year old Pacino is a scary tough guy… if we can believe a 64 year old Indy can swing across rafters and fight off 5 Commie soldiers single handedly… then why couldn’t we buy some of the following ideas? There is no such thing as age!

SEAN CONNERY BACK AS 007 IN “THE SOLACE OF MY PANTS”

Yes, the true James Bond is back, and this time the 78 year old British Secret Agent is coming face to face with his most cunning foe: The damn kids who live next door to him and won’t keep their stupid hip hop music down while he’s trying to nap in the afternoons. But one day after his morning fiber supplements he discovers there is more to the nuisance than he first suspected. The grandson of his old enemy, Dr. Julius No, is secretly orchestrating the noise in order to keep seniors awake during the day so that they sleep harder at night, at which point he sneaks into their homes and steal their pants and all the lose change in them (his name in the movie is Busta No, played by Vin Diesel). In an epic battle, Bond tracks down Busta No and attempts to unravel the mystery of the missing pants. In the end Bond has a fight to the death with Vin Diesel and beats the shit out of him, followed by anally raping him in the middle of the street to intimidate the hooligan kids so they’ll never bother him with their stupid music again.

ANDY GRIFFITH BRINGS DOWN CRACK DEALERS IN “THE MAYBERRY NIGHTMARE”

Things have changed for the 82 year old Sheriff Andy Taylor and the quite town of Mayberry since 1960. Serving in his 12th term as town sheriff, the tranquility of the little town is turned upside down when 200 Mexican drug lords set up operations and terrorize the citizens. After 3 years of putting up with the criminals, Sheriff Taylor has had enough and vows to take back his town no matter the cost. The shocking climax has Griffith beating the shit out of the gang leader (played by Mike MenSTEALia) with a medieval mace and then anally rapes him in the public square in front of all the gangsters who then are demoralized and leave town.

TOMMY LEE JONES SEEKS PAYBACK IN “COUNTRY BELONGS TO THIS OLD MAN, BITCH!”

Following the conclusion of the 2008 Oscar winning film “No Country For Old Men”, Sheriff Ed Tom Bell (played by Tommy Lee Jones) can’t relax in his retirement. He is haunted by the events in “No Country” and can find no rest. He realizes he will never be mentally free until he hunts down and kills Anton Chigurh (again played by Javier Bardem). Hot on his trail, Sheriff Bell tracks Anton to a secret martial arts tournament to the death in Thailand. Bell tricks Anton into entering the Tournament. Bell surprisingly defies all odds and destroys Anton in the tournament finals by breaking his back leaving him paralyzed. Bell then anally rapes Anton to get closure… then breaks his neck and kills him in the ring. The tournament attendees are stunned but mildly aroused.

PETER O’TOOLE DEFEATS TERRORISM IN “LAWRENCE OF ARABIA 2″

Long thought dead, Thomas Edward Lawrence has secretly been living in solitude back in the mid-eastern desert, the sight of his former glories. But when Lawrence finds out about the terrorist atrocities going on in the world and the inability of the west to capture Osama Bin Laden, Lawrence undestands the world needs him yet again to jump into action. No divided convictions this time… he must hunt and kill Bin Laden. For the past 40 years Lawrence has been training in the secret ways of the Arabic Desert Ninja. Slowly and methodically he kills his way up the terrorist command chain, drenching himself in terrorist blood until tracking Bin Laden down in disguise as a soccer game in a crowded stadium. The fight between Lawrence and Bin Laden spills onto the field until Lawrence breaks both Bin Laden’s legs, leaving him helpless. Lawrence then anally rapes Bin Laden in front of the stunned terrorist filled stadium as a warning to the rest of them. They all then give up their terrorist ways.

CLINT EASTWOOD LICKS BLOOD FROM HIS KNUCKLES IN “ANY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE 3″

Happily enjoying his retirement, Philo and his 30 year old Orangutan named Clyde spend their days in a Florida seniors home taking in the weather, doing some fishing and indulging in the odd prostitute now and again. But history repeats itself when the mob comes looking for Philo to pull him back into bare knuckles fighting yet again. The mob’s golden fight boy named “Henry the Destoryer” (played by UFC champion George St. Pierre) is constantly told that although he’s a great bare knuckles champion, he’ll never be as good as Philo was… and so he wants to fight the legend. The mob tells Philo to fight, and to lose or they’ll kill his monkey. But defying age and the odds, Philo reaches down to find the strength to fight for his and his monkey’s freedom and defeats Henry. Then, Philo anally rapes Henry in front of the mob… just because he’s pretty old thought for a second the bare ass belonged to Eva Mendes

So there you go folks, just a couple of ideas for brining out the old time heroes and showing the world that age is no issue and that a nearly 80 year old man can still take on a dozen lesser men! Are there any other I’ve left off that list that you’d like to see back in action?

Dan, a Movie Blog contractor (and metal enthusiast) was nice enough to hook me up with a link to this tattoo image from Entertainment Weekly.

Please bask in the glory of the Swayze-Centaur!

I am beside myself with glee. I have never been tempted to get someone else’s tattoo…. until now.

As some of you may remember, a little while back we launched a bit of a discussion around here regarding product placement in movies and films getting into bed with their marketing with corporations and products (you can see that article here).
One of the most blatant product placements we’ve seen in a big film this year so far has been that Burger King plug in Iron Man. Anyway, Time Magazine dug deep into older versions of the script only to find some scenes they never filmed that would have made the situation much worse (clearly the following is just a joke… but I thought it was pretty funny)

INT. TONY STARK’S LIMO - DAY

TONY STARK: Pull over… right here.
DRIVER: Where?
TONY STARK: At Burger King.
DRIVER: Are you serious?
TONY STARK: Didn’t you hear me say the first thing I wanted after being tortured in the desert by terrorists for three months was a real American cheeseburger?
DRIVER: Yeah, sure… but Burger King?
TONY STARK: Yes.
DRIVER: Let me get this straight. You kept your heart beating with a car battery while risking your life to build a suit of armor with a built-in flame-thrower… so you could eat at Burger King.
TONY STARK: Yes. In fact, I got the idea for the flame-thrower while thinking about Burger King’s great flame-broiled taste.
DRIVER: But there’s an In-N-Out Burger just a few blocks away.
TONY STARK: I want Burger King.
DRIVER: Now that you’re back, is the first car you’re gonna drive a Chevy Malibu?
TONY STARK: What?
DRIVER: Well, that’s like the Burger King of cars.
TONY STARK: Just order the cheeseburger.
DRIVER: Is the first girl you’re going to sleep with Carnie Wilson?
TONY STARK: Order it!
BURGER KING EMPLOYEE: (OVER SPEAKER) Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order?
DRIVER: My boss, the smartest, richest, coolest man in the world, who can eat literally anything he wants, has chosen, as his first meal after being a held hostage by madmen in a cave in Afghanistan, a Burger King cheeseburger.
BURGER KING EMPLOYEE: (OVER SPEAKER) Is the first girl he’s going to sleep with Carnie Wilson?
_________________________________________________________________

EXT. SKY OVER LOS ANGELES - NIGHT

Iron Man performs amazing aerial stunts.

IRON MAN: Jarvis, I’m starving. I’m stopping at that Burger King down there for a cheeseburger.
JARVIS: No need sir. Knowing your predilection for great American cheeseburgers, I’ve taken the liberty of opening a microscopic Burger King franchise inside your armor. As we speak, millions of nano-cheeseburgers are being injected into your bloodstream.
IRON MAN: Amazing. Can I get a chocolate shake?
JARVIS: Deploying milkshake enema now.
_________________________________________________________________

EXT. STARK ENTERPRISES - ROOF - NIGHT

Iron Man faces off against Iron Monger.

IRON MONGER: Isn’t it ironic, that a man who loves Burger King cheeseburgers… is being killed by a man who loves cheeseburgers that aren’t terrible?
IRON MAN: Damn you Obadiah Stane!
_________________________________________________________________

AFTER CREDITS SEQUENCE

Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) approaches Tony Stark.

NICK FURY: I’m here to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative.
TONY STARK: The Avengers Initiative? What’s that?
NICK FURY: Burger King.

Will the insanity never end? Reports are now coming in that the beloved Iron Man trailer is going to be turned into a full length movie version. I’m sure they’ll ruin it for sure.

Wildly Popular ‘Iron Man’ Trailer To Be Adapted Into Full-Length Film

This made me laugh my ass off. In the Southpark episode entitled “Canada On Strike” the idea is that the whole country of Canada goes on strike unless their demands are met, specifically they want some of that Internet Money. The whole episode is a pretty direct attack on the leadership of the WGA and their strike. As a matter of fact, the leader of the Canadian strike calls himself:

“I’m Steven Abootman, President of the World Canadian Bureau. Also known as the WGA”.

The episode takes some hilarious pokes at Canada (my home) and also makes some solid points about the WGA strike. It’s a little one sided for sure, but amazingly funny nonetheless. Check it out.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

So I stumbled across this little trailer for a project called “Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust”. I don’t even know if it’s real or not… all I can say is that if this is indeed real… it looks so awful that I’m going crazy inside to see it. No really, I want to see this stupid thing… I can’t explain it, but I do.

Ok this made me smile a lot and I ended up reading it about 3 times. We’ve all seen the various 9/11 conspiracy theory videos, well, now there is compelling evidence suggesting that the mighty Death Star was NOT destroyed by some farmer kid firing torpedos down a 2 meter wide exhaust shaft! The following suggests that perhaps there was an inside job conspiracy! This may shock you… read at your own risk!

We’ve all heard the “official conspiracy theory” of the Death Star attack. We all know about Luke Skywalker and his ragtag bunch of rebels, how they mounted a foolhardy attack on the most powerful, well-defended battle station ever built. And we’ve all seen the video over, and over, and over, of the one-in-a-million shot that resulted in a massive chain reaction that not just damaged, but completely obliterated that massive technological wonder.

Like many, I was fed this story when I was growing up. But as I watched the video, I began to realize that all was not as it seemed. And the more I questioned the official story, the deeper into the rabbit hole I went.

Presented here are some of the results of my soul-searching regarding this painful event. Like many citizens, I have many questions that I would like answered: was the mighty Imperial government really too incompetent to prevent a handful of untrained nerf-herders from destroying one of their most prized assets? Or are they hiding something from us? Who was really behind the attack? Why did they want the Death Star destroyed? No matter what the answers, we have a problem.

Below is a summary of my book, Uncomfortable Questions: An Analysis of the Death Star Attack, which presents compelling evidence that we all may be the victims of a fraud of immense proportions.

1) Why were a handful of rebel fighters able to penetrate the defenses of a battle station that had the capability of destroying an entire planet and the defenses to ward off several fleets of battle ships?

2) Why did Grand Moff Tarkin refuse to deploy the station’s large fleet of TIE Fighters until it was too late? Was he acting on orders from somebody to not shoot down the rebel attack force? If so, who, and why?

3) Why was the rebel pilot who supposedly destroyed the Death Star reported to be on the Death Star days, maybe hours, prior to its destruction? Why was he allowed to escape, and why were several individuals dressed in Stormtrooper uniforms seen helping him?

4) Why has there not been an investigation into allegations that Darth Vader, the second-ranking member of the Imperial Government, is in fact the father of the pilot who allegedly destroyed the Death Star?

5) Why did Lord Vader decide to break all protocols and personally pilot a lightly armored TIE Fighter? Conveniently, this placed Lord Vader outside of the Death Star when it was destroyed, where he was also conveniently able to escape from a large-sized rebel fleet that had just routed the Imperial forces. Why would Lord Vader, one of the highest ranking members of the Imperial Government, suddenly decide to fly away from the Death Star in the middle of a battle? Did he know something that the rest of the Imperial Navy didn’t?

In the video of the Death Star’s destruction, Lord Vader clearly exclaims “I have you now” then fires two shots. Those shots never impact — anywhere. Were they merely “added” to the “official” video after the event to make it appear that Lord Vader had at least attempted to fight off his alleged son?

Emperor Palpatine fails to act after being informed of the attack

6) Nerf-Herders defy the laws of physics? How could any pilot shoot a missile into a 2 meter-wide exhaust port, let alone a pilot with no formal training, whose only claim to fame was his ability to “bullseye womprats” on Tatooine? This shot, according to one pilot, would be “impossible, even for a computer.” Yet, according to additional evidence, the pilot who allegedly fired the missile turned off his targeting computer when he was supposedly firing the shot that destroyed the Death Star. How did the missile make a right angle turn after entering the exhaust port? How could a missile shot in the vacuum of space–that would tend to keep going in the same direction as it was released, according to the laws of physics–be *sucked* into an *exhaust* pipe? “Exhaust” means to exhale or blow out… Wouldn’t the missiles have been blown awry of their target rather than sucked in? If it had been an intake pipe, then the “bending” path of the missiles could be plausible. Why have these discrepancies never been investigated, let alone explained?

7) Why has their been no investigation into evidence that the droids who provided the rebels with the Death Star plans were once owned by none other than Lord Vader himself, and were found, conveniently, by the pilot who destroyed the Death Star, and who is also believed to be Lord Vader’s son? Evidence also shows that the droids were brought to one Ben Kenobi, who, records indicate, was Darth Vader’s teacher many years earlier! Are all these personal connections between the conspirators and a key figure in the Imperial government supposed to be coincidences?

8) How could a single missile destroy a battle station the size of a moon? No records, anywhere, show that any battle station or capital ship has ever been destroyed by a single missile. Furthermore, analysis of the tape of the last moments of the Death Star show numerous small explosions along its surface, prior to it exploding completely! Why does all evidence indicate that strategically placed explosives, not a single missile, is what destroyed the Death Star?

9) Prior to the destruction of the Death Star a smuggler named Captain Solo was reportedly given a large sum of money. At a crucial point in the battle, Captain Solo had an unobstructed shot on his choice of the fighters pursuing Skywalker, yet Solo did not take advantage of this opportunity to kill Darth Vader. Although Vader was in the process of firing upon Skywalker’s X-wing, Solo attacked the defensive fighter instead. In the aftermath, Vader escaped, while Solo still had crates of money in his cargo hold. Captain Solo eventually made his way to the Bespin system, where he was seen dining with none other than Vader, who was reportedly obsessed with obtaining Captain Solo’s ship (and the money contained therein). Solo’s ship was then seen flying into the super-structure of the second Death Star, destroying it just after Vader was able to get out (he was seen leaving a shuttle piloted by none other than Luke Skywalker). Yet through this whole sequence of events, the money was never seen removed from Solo’s ship. Was it used to bribe Darth Vader, who (allegedly) assassinated Palpatine? Did anyone other than Vader and Skywalker actually see Emperor Palpatine die?

10 ) During pilot debriefing we leaned that Obi Wan was the one who told Luke to turn off his targeting computer. He said he was told by Obi Wan to “Let go” and “Trust me”. This is the same Obi Wan who was, according to the official story, killed after sabotaging the Death Star by none other than Darth Vader BEFORE speaking to Luke. His convenient death places him inside the Death Star just before the explosions on the surface occur. By faking his death Vader would have given Obi Wan time to plant explosives. The only evidence of his death is his Jedi robe on surveillance cameras. And even that can’t be found because they decided to conveniently let the evidence burn in the planet atmosphere. Also, why are there reports from Endor that Lord Vader, Obi Wan and Yoda were seen together AFTER their deaths? And who other than the Empire has the capacity to fake their deaths?

11) Lord Vader executed an officer for incompetence by allowing the rebels to escape. He then orders another officer to disable the Millennium Falcon’s hyper drive. The rebels once again escape using the disabled hyper drive. Why was the officer responsible for caring out Lord Vader’s order to disable the hyper drive not executed? Why was he in fact given NO disciplinary action what so ever? Why did Lord Vader only disable the hyper drive? If Lord Vader didn’t want the rebels to escape, why didn’t he disable the ship entirely?

12) Why did the captain of the Imperial Stardestroyer not fire upon the lifepod with the droids carrying Death Star plans? The “official story” says he didn’t find the any signs of life. He said “Hold your fire. There are no life forms. It must have been short-circuited.” Why would he be looking for life when it was electronic plans he should have been looking for. Why did he jump to the conclusion it was “short-circuited”. Is he a lifepod engineer?

How can all this be just incompetence and coincidence? IMPOSSIBLE!

The most important question of all is why would a shadowy group in the Empire want to destroy such a technological wonder? Is it an excuse to invade Hoth and steal their oil; a planet which didn’t have anything to do with the attacks. Or is it to take away your religious freedoms to practice the dark side of the force? As incredible as this sounds it makes more sense than the official story.

Well, I’m convinced. “Use the force Luke” my ass! This was clearly an inside job! :P

(from Debunking911.com)

Good freaking grief. My friend Brad over at Ropeofsilicon pointed us to this video for the upcoming (and bad looking) Superhero movie. The thing is, it’s the most perfect spoof of the recent Tom Cruise nonsense I’ve seen to date. I actually laughed out loud watching this thing. Shame the movie will suck.